{"id":140,"date":"2012-06-16T20:12:17","date_gmt":"2012-06-16T20:12:17","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.corporatepoet.com\/?p=140"},"modified":"2012-06-16T20:16:24","modified_gmt":"2012-06-16T20:16:24","slug":"why-is-%e2%80%93-im-sorry-%e2%80%93-so-hard-to-say","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.corporatepoet.com\/?p=140","title":{"rendered":"Why is \u00e2\u20ac\u201c I’m sorry \u00e2\u20ac\u201c so hard to say?"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>I heard snatches of this conversation as I was jogging through the park to clear my head. I didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t hear the context, or who these two people were talking about, but it got me thinking about the relationship strengthening power of a sincere apology.<\/p>\n

Words have power.<\/p>\n

And two of the most powerful are, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m sorry.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n

When used appropriately \u00e2\u20ac\u201c with the right tone \u00e2\u20ac\u201c they have tremendous power to repair misunderstandings; to mend damage caused by unintended consequences; or to just acknowledge that challenging impacts are noticed and that you care.<\/p>\n

I was taught that on the basketball court. When we fouled a little too hard, or landed on someone\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s foot getting a rebound, we were taught to say, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153My bad…\u00e2\u20ac\u009d meaning “my mistake.” It kept the play competitive, but respectful.<\/p>\n

I was talking with a colleague about this and he told me he was taught to \u00e2\u20ac\u0153never say\u00e2\u20ac\u009d you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re sorry because it’s a sign of weakness.<\/p>\n

Why is \u00e2\u20ac\u201c \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m sorry.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d \u00e2\u20ac\u201c so hard to say?<\/p>\n

Do we think it is a sign of weakness? Do we think we give up power? Do we think it undercuts our role as leader?<\/p>\n

Even when people know an apology is warranted they often hedge and give what can be called the rotten apology<\/em> so common these days.<\/p>\n

You\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve probably heard it. It goes something like this: \u00e2\u20ac\u0153If anyone was offended, that was not what I intended…\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n

The rotten apology<\/em> implies that “this wasn’t my fault” but the fault of those who didn’t understand “my (clear) intent.” This kind of half-hearted mea culpa <\/em>usually makes the situation worse.<\/p>\n

Confident leaders know that their willingness to admit to a mistake is not a weakness, but a strength.<\/p>\n

For example, saying \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m sorry that happened,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d to acknowledge unintended consequences shows that the leader is aware, engaged and connected to the real consequences of his decisions.<\/p>\n

In today\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s competitive business climate, relationships are important.<\/p>\n

A well placed, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m sorry,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d can strengthen critical relationships needed for a team to remain committed, connected, and loyal to their leader\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s vision.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I heard snatches of this conversation as I was jogging through the park to clear my head. I didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t hear the context, or who these two people were talking about, but it got me thinking about the relationship strengthening power of a sincere apology.<\/p>\n

Words have power.<\/p>\n

And two of the most powerful are, . . . → Read More: Why is \u00e2\u20ac\u201c I’m sorry \u00e2\u20ac\u201c so hard to say?<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n

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